Monday, April 4, 2011

Made to Crave Mondays - Chapter 7 AND...How'd I do over the weekend?

Hello, my friends! I hope you had a FABULOUS weekend. I know I did. If you haven't read previous posts, I'll bring you up to speed. On March 21, I began a 13-week elimination diet. NO sugar, grain, gluten, or dairy for three months. However, this past weekend was my annual Mother/Daughter weekend getaway with my Mom, my sister, and three other families of Moms and Daughters that we've been getting together with at the same Bed and Breakfast for over 15 years. Every year we all look forward to getting together, catching up, and EATING! If you've never experienced a meal in an Amish home or a 7-course breakfast at the Flower Patch and Diamond House B&B in Arcola, IL...well, you just have to experience it to understand the levels of euphoria your taste buds will enjoy. I was a little nervous, to say the least, going into this past weekend. I didn't know if I could make it from Friday evening to Sunday afternoon without going off my eating plan. But...I'm very happy to report that I DID IT!
VICTORY! YES!!

Well, God really did it. I just allowed him to give me the strength! No homemade pies or piping hot baked-from-scratch rolls at Edna Mae's house on Friday night. No freshly made grape juice, angel biscuits, yummy muffins, or stuffed french toast or Belgian waffle boats with homemade whipped cream at the B&B. The only way I know this could have happened is prayer. The power that comes from prayer. So, thank you if you were one of the many praying for me. I'm so empowered by this victory...even though I haven't lost any weight from last week. That's OK. I can only imagine what would have happened had I gone off plan! So, what a great way to start a Made to Crave Monday, huh? With some GOOD news. Make sure to keep me updated on your good news with a comment on the blog post, OK? We need to cheer each other on!

So, without further ado let's dig in to Chapter 7 of Made to Crave by Lysa TerKeurst!

Chapter 7 Discussion Questions:

1. When she felt like she didn't measure up, Lysa says she kicked into withdrawal mode or fix-it mode. What mode do you kick into when you feel like you don't measure up? Jill's answer: Usually I kick in to eating mode in these situations. OR, I kick in to to controlling drive. I try to control everyone's behavior around me, which is always a GREAT idea, right? Ha!

2. Lysa describes how God used a passage from Isaiah to encourage her and affirm how much God wants to be in communication with us. If you could clearly hear God's words to you throughout the day, what kind of things would you hope you might hear him say? What, specifically, would you like to hear him say when you are struggling with food choices or issues related to your weight? Jill's answer: I would like to hear Him say, "You're beautiful! I love you! You are doing a great job serving Me!" When I am struggling with food choices or issues related to my weight I'd like to hear Him say, "I love you just the way you are. You are exceedingly lovely and have an inner glow that makes you even more attractive. It is not that I think you need to be a model on the cover of a magazine...but I do want to help You achieve optimum health so you can continue serving Me and being the Mom and Wife I've designed You to be. And, I will never leave You to fight this battle alone. I am here just waiting for You to call on Me!"

3. In the Bible we read that God's "divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness" ~ 2 Peter 1:3. In other words, with God's power we have everything we need to experience victory in our struggles. Do you feel you have everything you need from God in order to overcome your struggles with food? Or is this one of those truths that looks good on paper but doesn't seem to impact your everyday life? How might your relationship to food change if you could fully embrace this truth? Jill's answer: Well, you may remember that a couple of days before leaving for my weekend I experienced what I felt was failure in my eating. I had gone off the plan and eaten things I shouldn't have. Even some things I didn't really like. But, after the victory God's power enabled me to achieve this past weekend with temptation after temptation after temptation after temptation after temptation presenting itself...I KNOW that this truth is real and applicable to my every day life. I had friends praying for me. I was praying for me. I was reminded of promises I'd been reading in the Bible of God's ability to help me and I asked for that help. Also, I planned ahead. I had contacted the B&B and asked for whatever help they could offer with my dietary needs. And, they were VERY accommodating. They provided fresh fruit with no sugar added for me to enjoy while everyone else was diving into their belgian waffle boats full of bananas and strawberries covered with a sugary glaze and freshly whipped cream. They ordered a plain baked sweet potato at the restaurant we went to on Saturday night instead of the potato salad or twice backed, cheesy potatoes all my friends were eating. At first I didn't even have the confidence to check ahead and see what could be done to enable me to stay on plan over the weekend. But, I felt a tug on my heart to contact them and I'm so glad I did. I have seen God's divine power all over the place over this past weekend! And it is honestly changing my relationship to food. I'm not saying I'll never go astray again. But, I certainly have the God-given power to stay the course!

4. "I'm a Jesus girl who can step on the scale and see the numbers as an indication of how much my body weighs and not as an indication of my worth". How do the numbers on the scale impact your self-worth? Is Lysa's statement one you can make with full confidence or is it something you aspire to but haven't quite reached? Jill's answer: It's definitely one I haven't quite reached, but absolutely aspire to. This is a tough one. Everywhere you turn a woman's worth seems to be equated with her physical appearance, including her weight. So...I'm praying to be able to one day truthfully make this statement; loud and proud. But, for now, it is a daily battler seeing my worth outside of my overall appearance!

5. What self-defeating thoughts or hurtful comments from others routinely run through your mind when it comes to food and weight? What insights and perspective do you gain when you scrutinize them with these questions: Are you true? Are you beneficial? Are you necessary? Jill's answer: I can totally scrutinize hurtful comments from others in this way in just about every area outside of physical appearance. If someone makes a hurtful comment about my skills, abilities, or my faith...I can and have been able to wave them off. Sometimes it's harder than other times. But, usually, in the end, I'm able to determine the truth and logically decide which comments to heed and which to forget. The same is true with self-defeating thoughts. However, when it comes to weight and appearance...this is tough. Especially when most people you meet for the first time say, "You really don't look anything like I thought you would." Being in radio, this is a common occurrence. I know in my head that people generally assign a mental picture to someone they've only heard and never seen. I do this myself and am often surprised when I meet the person and he or she looks differently from the way I'd imagined. Maybe they're smaller, bigger, lighter, darker, a red-head instead of a brunette. It's not that I'm disappointed with how they actually look...it's just that it's different than the image my mind had conjured up for that person. But, it is very hard for my heart to remember all of this every time I work a radio station event. There have been many times I've even apologized for not being the image that my voice had created in the other person's mind. I know it's silly but I automatically assume I am much shorter, fatter, and uglier than the person or people had imagined me to be. I assume they are disappointed or even amused by how I look face to face. Even if they meant to be hurtful, and usually that's not the case, I need to ask God to help me find the truth...His truth. Even if I'm not every person's ideal beauty. I know God designed me. He thinks I'm beautiful. My husband thinks I'm beautiful. And, in my daughter's eyes right now, I'm the most beautiful woman ever. These are the truth I need to hold onto. And, I can see how Lysa's suggested questions would be really helpful at times when I'm struggling with my own thoughts or the potentially negative comments from someone else. Does it really matter that my older brother always told me he thought I was short, fat, and ugly? Of course it hurt me and left scars. But, does that make his comments true? NO! Does it really matter that a woman who came up to me at the Women's Lifestyle show in Peoria when I pregnant told me how surprised she was that I SO big, SO early? Yes, it hurt. But, no it doesn't matter what she thought. And, does it matter if I ever AM a disappointment in person to anyone who's ever heard me on the radio? It does hurt my pride. But, seriously, I know what God thinks and I know what my family thinks. And, I know these thoughts and comments are not true, beneficial, or necessary!!

Whew, these are emotionally tough questions to answer, huh? Well, it's your turn now. And, remember...I was totally open and honest with you. I really feel this is the best way for us to help each other. It's so encouraging to know we aren't alone, don't you think? So, I'd love to hear from you. Please leave a comment on this Blog Post if ya can. And, have a FABULOUS day!!!

2 comments:

  1. First of all, congratulations on staying on your food plan at the B&B!!

    When I feel like I don't measure up, I tend to go into withdrawal mode. I want to be a hermit and not be seen because I feel like everyone is seeing me as a failure.

    In my head I know that with God's help, I CAN have victory over my food struggles, but my heart tends to forget that sometimes. In the past, I haven't asked God for help because I feel like it's not a problem to bother Him with. I've learned that God DOES care about my issues with food and that until I have victory over the battle, I cannot be the person He created me to be.

    I still struggle with feeling like the number on the scale defines who I am. I think that's hard to get out of your head in the world that we live in and the obsession with looks. That's part of the reason that I am only weighing myself monthly. I don't want to see the day to day changes or get discouraged when the scale doesn't seem to be moving. I want work on eating right and exercising and just being healthier and I know the weight loss will follow. I did weigh myself about a week ago and have lost 10 pounds since I started, so was very encouraged by that!

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  2. Cheri, I am so with you. I even find myself at times fostering a stereotype about people who are overweight, even though I'm ONE OF THEM! It's very hard in today's society to divorce worth from appearance. Thank you for your openness. And, WAY TO GO on losing 10 pounds. That is tremendous success, in a healthy way. Great job, my friend!

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